


Fade Out

by Lost_xoxo



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Feels, Chanbaekdrabble, Drabble, I Don't Even Know, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-20
Updated: 2019-04-20
Packaged: 2020-01-16 05:26:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18514813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lost_xoxo/pseuds/Lost_xoxo
Summary: Sometimes you just gotta let it go.





	Fade Out

**Author's Note:**

> Years went rolling past us,  
> but I lost you along the way.  
> I would give all my tomorrows  
> for just one yesterday.

Entering the park, a slight breeze rustles the leaves making them fall to the solid ground one by one. They both choose the old bench on the furthest corner. 

The bench has seen too many passing seasons, the once fresh state has become a sombre brown, but still beautiful.

It was Chanyeol’s idea to take a walk, Baekhyun grumbled from his couch something about feeling lethargic and not wanting to walk all the way to the park but he ended up agreeing anyway. 

The sun has gone down, the laughter and chatter of the children dying down with the light slowly fading to black.

They both sit in silence for awhile, Chanyeol can feel Baekhyun’s impatience growing, His long fingers running over the swirls on the wooden bench. He knows his friend would rather be curled up on the couch instead of spending an afternoon in the park. 

“Why are we here?” Baekhyun asks eyes darting across the park lazily. 

“Remember us coming here to play?” Chanyeol sighs quietly reminiscing about their high school days.

“You used to cry your eyes out every time you lost a game, yah I think I remember” Baekhyun chuckles shaking his head pulling at the long sleeves of his tshirt. Its already getting cold. 

“I am going to _miss_ this”

“Why are you being so nostalgic all of a sudden?” Baekhyun asks jokingly, smiling as he leans back on the bench. Stretching his legs in the front, shoes grazing against the grass.

For once Chanyeol can’t return Baekhyun’s smile, maybe seeing the solemn look on his face Baekhyun’s smile fades and he just stares at him questioningly, waiting for him to say something, he sweeps his tongue over his lips, a gesture so familiar to Chanyeol he wants to engrave it in his mind.

Chanyeol has gone over this again and again, what words to say but right now everything starts to jumble up loosing its meaning.

“I don’t know how to say it, but I don’t think I can do this anymore” Chanyeol says quietly, but he is pretty sure the other has heard it. 

This catches Baekhyun’s attention, his relaxed composure breaks and he sits straight, eyes filled with queries.

“What do you mean?” There is confusion written all over Baekhyun’s face.

At that moment Chanyeol thinks he should steer the conversation to something else, dismiss it as a joke, shove it under the rug for the millionth time and act like they are _fine_. That he is _fine_.

But he is done pretending. Maybe it’s better to get your heart shattered completely at once than watching it break into tiny pieces _everyday_.

“Baek I have been in love with you since I can remember, Each and every moment I spend with you i fall a little deeper and I keep hoping that you will feel the same way. There are times you make me feel like am the only one, but the next you act like I don’t matter. I thought Il be okay with whatever we have because it is better than nothing but I can’t, for once I want to be selfish”

When Chanyeol finishes speaking he doesn’t dare to look at Baekhyun afraid he will give in to the temptation and take back his words, instead he focuses on the all too yellow lamp light standing tall.

He remembers a particular night a few days ago, A very drunk Baekhyun in his arm asking him to take him home, his voice slurring with each words. It wasn’t anything new he had been called in to rescue Baekhyun from his bad dates or drunken encounters in bar many times. When he finally tucked Baekhyun to his bed he had begged him to stay.

Even though Chanyeol has spent countless nights with his best friend it was never easy on his part to act like it was just a sleep over specially when Baekhyun snuggled upto him, wrapping his arms around his body unknowingly yet Chanyeol’s heart would beat so loud making him think that Baekhyun might actually hear him.

Baekhyun opens his mouth to say something then closes it quickly unable to form his words, pausing he swallows hard , “You love me? Why didn’t you tell me before?”

There was so many moments that Chanyeol almost wanted to confess his feelings for his friend, the words were at the top of his tongue but the time was never _right_. 

“I didn’t think I needed to, everything was right in open, I have always been there for you, but you just didn’t notice” 

“I like you, I like you so much I don’t want us to stop being friends” Baekhyun moves closer, fingers reaching out to take Chanyeol hands in his own.

The desperation in his voice rings in Chanyeol ears, he finally turns to his side to get a look at Baekhyun who looks genuinely sad, his soft eyes are etched with worry. His pink lips slightly parted. He still looks beautiful Chanyeol thinks.

“That is the problem, I don’t like you I love you its different. I can’t watch you flirting with others. I can’t hear you talking people like you want them and act like I am okay and most importantly I can’t be your friend....I can’t...”

“Chanyeol I am sorry” Baekhyun voice breaks a little.

Chanyeol cant tell why Baekhyun is apologising? Probably because he can’t return his feeling but Chanyeol doesn’t dare to look at him, he knows it will hurt him more. He gives a gentle squeeze to Baekhyun’s hand before _letting_ _go_.

“Don’t...just don’t...” Baekhyun trails off not being able to finsh his words, hands grabbing Chanyeol’s shirt hastily to which he turns around to face him and before he can say anything there is a soft pair of lips pressing onto his slightly colder ones. The kiss isn’t perfect it’s a little sloppy, their tongue battling against each other in a desperate need to feel something, to make this worth It. It’s not the first time they have kissed, but it’s definitely the last, and just the thought makes Chanyeol’s heart ache. This is a goodbye kiss, a parting gift.

Baekhyun is the first one to pull away fingers loosening his grip from the material of Chanyeol’s shirt leaving it crumpled, his now slightly red lips are pressed in a thin line. His jaw tightened and he has an unreadable expression and Chanyeol doesn’t want to read into it because he is sure he will break, he knows himself and he isn’t the strongest when it comes to his friend.

When Chanyeol finally stands up from the seat, the park is completely dark and silent except for the gentle rustle of the autumn breeze that makes him slightly shiver.

“Take care Baek” Chanyeol’s voice is calm to his own surprise, because he can still feel his elevated heartbeat against his chest, the _bittersweet_ taste of the kiss still lingering in his mouth. There is no right words to say because nothing he says will matter not anymore so he chooses to say the least.

Baekhyun just gives a small nod and quickly looks away. Chanyeol pretends that he doesn’t notice how Baekhyun’s lips tremble and his eyes glisten with tears.

But Baekhyun doesn’t _stop_ him neither does he say anything when he watches him leave. Chanyeol walks out of the park and reaches to the main road, he looks back one last time he doesn’t even know why. A small part of him hopes for something that _never_ happens.

But Chanyeol knows that hereafter he will have his sudden _vulnerable_ moments thinking about their friendship. His chest feels heavy over the thought of getting his heart broken. But this is a good break the type that leads to healing and new ways onward. Someday he will be over this, _someday_.

                                ***

**Author's Note:**

> I was bored and I wrote this bcz I realised I haven’t written chanbaek in awhile. I hope the story makes sense :(


End file.
